Fear is a very complex emotion. It drives people to do things they never thought they could, or would. It paralyzes others into inaction, gripping their hearts with ice-cold hands. Fear can be a creator of new experiences or a catalyst for overcoming new challenges. It can also be a wall of bricks in your path when your car has just lost its brakes.
Fear is why, when confronted with a choice regarding my chemotherapy, I always stall a bit. I always try to buy more time to think and consider my options. And even when the decision is clear, I still feel that tugging in my chest, that nagging sensation of fear creeping, ever so easily into my consciousness, past all the defenses I try so hard to build to keep it out.
I’m due to start new medications this week, because the tumor is stable. And that isn’t…
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